Breast Cancer Journey: Six-month check up

Thursday, 20 August, 2026

Women’s College Hospital has a Transition (After Cancer Treatment) Clinic and that’s where I was headed. This date was stamped in my memory as where I’d get answers, six months after my last mammogram in February and about nine months after my last oncology clinic visit. I’m not exactly sure why some people report having their follow-ups (including routine scans) every three months, but at my hospital group it’s every six months and no routine tests other than the yearly mammogram.

Anyway, I was looking forward to this visit and, all in all, I was happy with it. Yay.

I got there a little early and went in right away. A nurse practitioner saw me for most of the time I was there, during about forty minutes of questions from both of us – duly recorded and answered. No stone left unturned. Another yay.

The doctor came in briefly – Carol Townsley. I liked her for the ten or fifteen minutes she was there.

Takeaways – I’ll have an X-Ray for my hip and thigh pain; Go ahead with my ultrasound (ordered by my doctor’s office) for the lower abdominal pain; Repeat the bone density scan to see what therapy I might need to avoid osteoporosis (my hormone blockers and cancer treatments weaken bones); Get some bloodwork to check in on my Potassium and Ferritin levels. It’s not a lot, yet a lot. I chose not to do the lab work and X-Ray that same day – because it’s a lot.

So far so good. Another mammogram in February, followed by another check-up at this same clinic. The doctor told me that any time I had concerns or questions, to call in and she’d meet with me by phone. I looked forward to this visit and was happy with it. Almost every cancer survivor you might meet will tell you that after treatment with its intense and regular scrutiny, it’s normal to feel at sea and scared. It’s a long stretch of six months now, but I don’t feel abandoned and that’s a good thing.

Who I am now. Or is it? I have to say I love how the beauty feature on edit ignores my after-cataract-surgery eye bags, and that angles help. This is not a deflection but the whole truth. The long curls are gone (not missing them, surprisingly), and the boobs are a whole other story; my inner thoughts aren’t very different. I’m still me.

Index of all my Breast Cancer Journey Posts

Not focussed…YET

Wednesday, 12 August, 2026

Today is a sit-at-the-laptop day so a good one to get started on the latest. Why the title? Well, I work on a mental health charity site (ssshhh, those who know who I mean). As part of our work, the charity gives us 45-minute monthly meetings where we discuss our mental health. Yes, the work can be emotionally challenging. We chat and share concerns and triumphs, but we also get a mini lesson on mental wellness. This comes from one. Whatever you think you are not getting done or right, say it but add the word yet.

I had my eye surgery follow-up yesterday. All is well. My right eye (the first) is noticeably less focussed than my left. My laconic surgeon assured me that this was normal and that in a month I could get glasses to correct my distance vision. Looking forward to that. I’m really good at seeing both sides of things. I can see my laptop screen and read most things – maybe I need a weak pair of reading glasses for that very tiny stuff too – but I can now see other things. What things? My wrinkles! And, wow, soft focus was good for one thing – I thought I was more attractive than this. Why did no one tell me? My vanity is in overload, so my next job is getting over it. I can’t get over it…YET.

Inert but annoying tools in the eye surgeon’s office

After the visit, I thought I might see Robin and send a package back to its sender. It was hot as I wandered through Kensington Market, which ends/begins at College Street where the surgeon was. I need basil. Kensington Market is a hippy throwback. It’s full of vintage clothing stores, street art, and eclectic places to eat. I’ve walked through here so many times over so many years and seen the changes.

The land was first purchased by George Taylor Denison (for whom an area street is named) and a home was built for him in 1815. The Denison estate was subdivided in the 1850s, and thirty years later, houses were built for the Irish and Scottish immigrant labourers coming to Toronto. The housing, some of which still stands, was built in the style of Victorian architecture row houses. (Must check that out, on Wales Street). That style persists. After the Irish and Scottish, other immigrant populations followed in waves. In the early twentieth century came Eastern European Jewish immigrants and some Italians, and like most immigrant areas, there was dense population and poverty. As the immigrants thrived, they moved within the area but to more space, better housing conditions, and opportunities to create storefront businesses. The market was born. The wider area was packed with tailors, furriers and bakers. There were 60,000 Jews by the 1920s and 1930s and over 30 local synagogues. When I arrived in Toronto and eventually found the area where I lived in the early 70s for a while, the area was still considered a Jewish market. When I arrived to live there briefly, the Jewish population dominated. They lived in the houses east of Spadina and above the stores in spacious apartments. Stores along Spadina and into the market were full of the immigrants’ preferred goods, jobbers, and in the market Eastern European food. I remember the crates of live chickens and the bustle of people buying their weekly food. In those days Saturdays had open air stalls on the street, only seen here now on special days in the warmer weather. The Jews moved out to the suburbs, and the immigrants from the Azores moved in and spread farther west, creating Little Portugal along Dundas Street West. They were followed by those from the Caribbean and East Asia. This was now an even more incredibly diverse community. During the Vietnam War, the American ‘draft dodgers’ and political objectors had arrived in Toronto, settling here and further east. The market took on and has pretty much maintained its hippy, bohemian air. The East Asians, particularly the Chinese, gradually took over the main street of Spadina Avenue, which borders Kensington Market and created a new Chinatown, the older one being closer to Yonge Street – the centre of Toronto. Then came even more immigrants, from Central America, Somalia, Ethiopia, Sudan, Iran, Vietnam, Chile and other global trouble spots. In the market, the choice of food and goods was, and remains, beyond eclectic. While the offerings in the market are ethnically diverse, the Latin Americans have a very strong presence, especially on Augusta Avenue. Enough tacos to build another CN Tower. Confession: all those immigrant waves might be slightly mixed up/out of order, there were so many, but I did my best. It’s eclectic!

The market’s architectural style hasn’t changed much. In the 60s the community escaped a plan to tear down the Victorian houses and replace them with modern apartment buildings, but there are a few higher-rise modern loft-style buildings at the edges of the market area.

Typical market Victorian style house


The Latin American and Mexican population of Toronto can buy all their home favourites in Kensington Market, especially on Augusta Avenue
Millions of pupusas have been eaten here. This store is a mainstay
Cheese Magic. A pricier cheese boutique and one store that’s hung on longer than most
The old, the new, and some cheap cigarettes (perhaps’Reservation cigarettes’ or ‘native smokes.’) I’m not sure. there are heavy rules involved, and they’re the sort of thing vendors hide under the counter.
Ontario peach season is here. My favourite pie this side of the Atlantic. No, I haven’t had any this year. Worth breaking the diet for? Hmm

There’s been gentrification here. No space to write about all the changes, but notably, there’s now one butcher remaining and one fish shop, where before there were at least three of each. The butcher of yesterday was a bustling and low-priced Eastern European meat market. The counters were piled high with smoked sausages, and ham hocks, and the smell of smoked and fresh meat hung in the air. For $2 I could buy a hock and make meals that stretched over two or three days. Those days are gone. The butcher now has much higher priced, fancier, fare and I can’t smell a thing.

In this spot there was a cheap butcher until this one took over. Not Cheap, Not At All
Sanagan’s has a British butcher, so they make these things. I’ve tried them all and 😕👎🏼

There could be chapters on Kensington Market (future focus!), but I needed to move on, if only to find shade. At the only remaining greengrocers (of the original) half dozen, I needed to buy basil, only to remember that the entryway stairs were going to be a problem. I’d already abandoned the idea of buying a samosa in the Indian restaurant due to the entry stairs. Samosa and chai is such a nice breakfast. Not today. I found the side entrance (no stairs) where a Chinese-speaking lady cleared a space for me and carried my walker up to the level where I could find the basil. I found it and some nice arugula (nothing like the UK rocket – different species here), paid, and then the same lady helped me down and out to the street. Yay for kindness. No photos of the store, that’s a miss.

Thwarted by the samosa and chai miss, I thought some dim sum might work instead. There was a place near the shop I wanted to visit, so I headed down to Dundas Street and over to Spadina Avenue. I found street and van art along the way. The market has a lot, no favourites here. I miss seeing good street art everywhere.

Tripping

It was such a hot day on Kensington Avenue. I love that they’re sweeping – gave me Italy vibes
Chinatown main intersection. By now I was wilting. Where the Rexall is was once a burlesque theatre

Dim sum was calling and I arrived to find another high step to get into the bakery. Ha. I made it in and ordered carefully. This is cash only and I had just $10. My order of chive and shrimp dumpling and a bottle of water came to $9.30. Just made it. Dim sum cost double of when I lived here with Robin, in an alley off Chinatown. While I was eating I remembered that the parcel return depot also had four steps. That’s that then. Robin called to say he couldn’t meet me, no shock, and I could hear he was in the shop almost next door to the parcel return. I was mid-dumpling and cool rest break, so I didn’t ask him to help. Another day. Instead I went to the Chinese supermarket that Robin’s apartment overlooks and bought what I needed.

Close to my dim sum goals in Chinatown

My shrimp and chive dumplings – very clean and clear
Toronto loves a Chinese bakery. Many cheap ‘treats’ but a far cry today from the 3 for a dollar offerings of yesterday
Purchases – newly favourite brand of fresh kimchim and I can never resist the ‘seafood’ mushrooms – Bunapi-shimeji

I’d visited the drugstore a bit earlier in the week. With my rides back from Chinatown and then this little visit, I conquered the TTC three times this week. Go me!

Posters you want to eat. I saw a UK TikTok with Guinness gravy a few days ago – want! As for ice cream cake, I may have to break my diet and try – which one?
A cool break after shopping at the Portuguese store. Field Trip wins again – a macchiato and a cheddar and chive scone. Bring back the Zaatar but save me from my love of a good scone
The Paradise theatre on Bloor Street. All the offbeat content you want. This ties into my Kensington Market tour, since I associate these rep cinemas with hippy days in Toronto. That vibe prevails. Longer story here for another time
My pharmacy has that old-fashioned Englishy feel but I miss that unique smell of Boots Chemists (antiseptic and ointments?)
Ethiopian convenience store near the station. All the gold-plated stuff you desire….(listening, Mr President?)
Sunk! Someone put temptation a few hundred metres away from me, right opposite the station. Hide my eyes
Just in front of the subway station entrance. Noticed it for the first time (new vision?)
The subway handicap entrance and I are old friends now
Silently ranting about the TTC bus’s lack of space for strollers and such. No one can pass

Finally, I did a baked beans test this week. John had brought a UK tin with him, and we never did do the comparison. Time to do it. Thoughts – the Canadian beans had a slightly deeper spiced flavour and weren’t as saucy. They might have been a tiny bit sweeter, although the label puts them as equal for sugar content. For me, the UK version wins, but ask me again tomorrow. It was a narrow margin. Need to get the US version to see how it fares.

Heinz beans comparison and taste test. UK on the left, Canada on the right

I did take photos of  the old man’s garden but won’t include them. For two days now, a helper has been watering and weeding. Those vines are climbing even higher. If I had wings or better legs or whatever, I’d scale that fence at night and become a veggie burglar.

Not ready…YET.

Meandering in place

Saturday, 8 November, 2025

This morning I walked to the store. I bought a Sausage McMuffin, which is a very rare thing for me to do, but today I thought why not. No egg. Just the sausage and pretend-cheese.  In the Longo’s near the flat, I bought a machiato (single – semi wet, so she said – and I picked up two packs of marked-down meat (good till tomorrow) and bemoaned the fact I had hesitated too long for the last bag of marked-down gianduiotti and it was gone. While I was doing all this, I knew I was ready to write again. It’s been an age.

Sausage McMuffin wrapper in Canada
Always bilingual in Canada. Sausage McMuffin this morning

An age.

Why? At first it was just ennui, an unwavering sense of boredom with my surroundings. I wasn’t used to this milder interest in where I was. It wasn’t crushingly boring, but it just didn’t stir me. What to write about? I’ll confess that this feeling really hasn’t changed all that much. I don’t know if it will.  But then last October everything got murky.

Cancer.

I am just putting it out there without explanation for now. I have written a lot in draft and email and chat and, as always, in my head and I feel ready to talk about it.  I’m not quite sure how to go about it because some of you may not want to know. My plan right now is to start plopping things in here and make the subject line Breast Cancer Journey – xxx. That way, anyone who wants not to know, not to get inside my head, can skip those bits. When they’re all done, which I hope they will be, I’ll link them all. They’re part of me so I don’t think I want them to stand alone. Deal? (Do let me know so my hesitation moves to determination.)

So…Art Therapy. I’m in a group. We’re part of an art therapist’s next thesis. It’s hard. It’s much harder than I expected, but that’s because I hear the other women’s (yes, all women) stories. They’re bittersweet, crushing, sadder than I can explain. And then I feel  lucky, and then I feel bad about feeling lucky, and then I feel maybe I’m not going to be lucky, and then I don’t know how I feel. But sad, yes sad.

I’ve not been pleased with what I’ve done. The other women draw abstract forms that express so much. They range from amateur to promising, the latter maybe more than that. My drawings are poignant, too complicated, too real (too?) and they all depict ‘home’ in various ways. What I’ve been writing about is being me – I just want to be me – because this journey creates an unreal feeling, a sense of having morphed into this unrecognisable person. It’s a person who feels detached, often unwell, and in my case certainly a nomad in more than the sense of where I call home.

This week the assignment was The Path – where is it, how does it look, are there signposts, are there forks, how does the path feel? So here is mine, the most complicated of the group and thoroughly me.

Art therapy – 7 November 2025

At the bottom of the picture is a barbed wire fence. It’s daunting,  but if you look closely, there are a few gaps to wriggle through if you want to get onto the path. It lies, yellow (brick road, of course) just through the fence and begins. At first, there are many thorny bushes to make me hesitate moving forward, and although these start to disappear, they crop up here and there, showing that even near the destination there’ll be challenging times. On the right of the photo there are pleasant distractions, a tree stump to sit on, a swing for the fun of it. To the right is a duck pond with a bench to sit on. The top of the pond is swampy, it’s not all lovely. A thorn bush and stump block the path near the top – more determination is needed. Throughout, the trees are flourishing, and there are nests – this place can be nurturing. At the very end of the path – home.  It’s yellow,  with a yellow sun in the sky to echo that. Two smoking chimneys show that someone is home and there’s a welcome inside.

Not hard to interpret this. It’s a difficult journey, one I want to abort many times, where I feel I can’t go on. My love of photos that show gardens so wild that the houses are only barely visible is a metaphor for home being there, but you need to look for it.

I’ll do my very best to keep writing and share my journey. It will be here if you want.

 

One thing I haven’t mentioned is how bad my eyesight is now. I was due to get cataracts removed, and that went pear-shaped after my diagnosis. If you spot mistakes, it’s because I am seeing things in double-vision and in a faded version. Getting my eyes fixed will come next, but it’s a tough decision to allow my body to be invaded again so soon. Wish me luck!